So here I am at Hofstra and I’m blogging at around 8:13 in the evening my time. Probably the most dangerous time for me to write because I write too much miscellaneous stuff in the evening that’s not really interesting to the human mind. Writing online, depending on my mood and especially the time of day, though, is a liberating experience for me. To me, writing online is a way to release any tensions that I have from the day, week, month, etc. and it can also be a platform in which I can share my goals, dreams, and accomplishments. However, I also feel anxious when I write online – what kind of strangers will read my work? what if anyone from my class, from my high, middle, and elementary schools reads my stuff? What will they think? Will they contact me if they find something offensive? In that sense, I suppose you could say I’m very self-conscious when it comes to writing online, but, compared to several years ago, I am a lot less so. Before, I worried too much about what people thought of me. The phrase “it depends on who you know” didn’t exactly help my case either. Not to mention the whole “universities and jobs look at your social media” concept is a horrifying thought to me; my career determined by how I use social media? That’s not exactly the most comforting thing in the world, even though that’s probably the point.
However, as time went on, I became less and less concerned about my digital image. Sure, I try to maintain a sense of decorum and respectability while online; no one wants to interact with a jerk, after all. But, constantly worrying about my image, I found, was incredibly exhausting and took too much of my time when I could be spending my energy on things that actually need it. So now I’m less concerned and I just write what I want: stories, journal-like posts, re-posts, and anything else related. Of course, I still get a little antsy about complete strangers reading my stuff every now and then, especially if they’re from prospective jobs that I might apply for in the future, but it’s not as severe as it was years ago.